About Me., Update

Fun times.

Okay, so let me start off by saying that my depression hasn’t been the best here of late. I know that I need to keep up with this blog no matter if my depression or PTSD is acting. I have been trying to post but I am myself worst critic. I know what I need to do. I am trying to keep up on my school work and a few other things. I lost my job recently. So, that’s not a good thing. I know that I need to find a new one but at the same time I need to focus on my schooling. But now that I don’t have a job I can try to start uploading more. I am trying to find a way to do what I love and this blog. So, I think I am going to be uploading more of my writings. I find it best to write random stories before working on your main stories. I call them throw away stories. You don’t need to finish them just set a timer and just write how your day was or how something didn’t turn out right. I try to do this daily. No matter what problems I have. Doesn’t always work but it gets me back into the writing mindset. The best for a writer to be. You don’t have to be a tortured soul to be a writer.

Let me tell you some things about me and what i am like. In my household it is a known fact that I don’t have a very good self esteem. I try hard everyday to see the positive in that day as well as what I did right. But most days I don’t succeed and seeing the positive in that day or what I did right. Is normally one or the other never both. Sleeping is something that I either do too much or I don’t do enough of. It’s very hard for me to stay awake during the day and it is very hard for me to go to sleep at night. Some say that i am a night owl. I’ve had jobs that were over night and i couldn’t stay awake through them, but i couldn’t stay awake through a day-shift job. Which leads into me having more self esteem problems. It’s a never ending pit. I know most of you probably don’t want to hear about this but i need to give you guys some understanding into the way that i am. Depression is a life long battle. That most people can overcome it but some can not. I’ve been living with depression for eight years now. On and off medication. I have never stopped taking my meds unless I was told to. That’s how I’ve been. There is high’s and low’s that i deal with being bipolar. If you would like to know more about them and how they affect me like and comment on this post, telling me to make more posts on this topic. I am open to just about anything.

On the topic of the book reviews. I love to read books. I love sharing what I like about a book. The thing is that I take a long time to read books, when I have a lot of school work. So, I am going to keep doing the book reviews but I am not going to do them ever month like I want to. I will be doing them when I can. I don’t know how often they will be but I do know that I will keep doing them. Now, working on myself esteem is going to be a hard thing to do. I know that I can do it. But it is going to take sometime. I don’t know how long but I will be working on it for the rest of my life. It isn’t something that can be fixed without changing somethings. I know I’m kind of going on a rant here but it’s not really a bad rant. It’s more of an update on what I’m planning to do with the blog going forward. This is also explanations of why certain things haven’t been done that I said I would do. I really hope that my readers are understanding and are willing to work with me on some things. As long as I keep posting on my blog. I’m trying to keep myself awake so that I can see the sunrise and take photos of it. I want to make this a full-time job but I don’t know how and in order to do that I need to learn more about SEO and web hosting. My head is hurting because I am thinking so hard on this. But I am going to be buying a web hosting thing soon in hopes to get more readers. Well that’s all I got to say for now. I love you guys. Have a good night and a good day. 

Always remember to be happy because you never know who’s falling in love with your smile. ~Unknown

Always remember to be happy because you never know who's falling in love with your smile Picture Quote #1

Writings

Wolfe’s Aventures.

*I can’t find the writing prompt that this came from, but I am going to post it anyways.*

“Mis. Wolfie are you in there?” The Man says from the other side of the door. there is six people with him “We are coming in.” the man says. then I hear the door open “Find her.” he says, “We need her alive and unharmed.” I wish I knew who they worked for.

“Boss she is nowhere to be found.” the woman says. thank god they didn’t look in the next room.

“She has to be here we seen her walk into this room.”

“Boss, the window was open when we came in here? could she have jumped. since she is a vampire she could make it through the four-story jump?”

“Fuck I didn’t think to put someone outside in case she went out the window.” few I thought for sure that someone seen me jump to the next window. “Let’s go.” When I see all seven of them get into the car I walk out of the and plug my headphones into my ears and start to play bartender. as I walked out of the hotel I seen my bike was still sitting outside. I love how they have no clue what I drive or how I get from place to place within days.

“Hey lady can you help me cross the road?” an old man asks me.

“Yeah why not.” I say not really caring, because I had all the time in the world. Once I helped the man across the street he handed me a five Dollar bill. “Thank you. You are so kind.”

“No problem. You helped me I will help you get lunch.”

“Thank you.” I walked across the street to my bike and went to the closest gas station and filled up. It felt good to give them the slip that easily. Could they be from my family’s work? No, I don’t think they pay someone that much to find me, I think they think I am dead because this is the first time in six years they have found me. I have been on the run for most of my life. As far as back I can remember. I have always wondered why I am running but then I remember that these people I am running from killed my mother and father. I hate being who I am. I hate to being on the run. I just want to have a normal life, where I can go to school and have friends and have a happy family one day. Bam, someone hit my bike. “Who the hell do you think you are?” I yell when I see someone getting out of the car. I try to get up but can’t move my legs.

“Why weren’t you paying attention to the cars around you?” says a man. “You could have been killed.” He yells. “You’re lucky it is just your legs.” He binds down. He goes to touch me, but I flinch away. I smell the people that were at the hotel. I start looking around to try to find where they are, but I can’t find them. “Let me take you to the hospital?” I shake my head and try to get up. “Your legs are looking really bad, let me help you.”

“No. I will be found.” I focus on where the pain is and heal it. I get up and pick up my bike. “Thank you for trying to help me.”

“I FOUND HER!” The guy yells as I hope on my bake and ride away as fast as I can.

*I don’t know why it didn’t show the story. I am so sorry about that. I know it is short but that’s all I can come up with for now. Do you like it so far? If so comment telling me what you liked about it. Don’t forget to leave a like. Also tell me if you guys would like some more.

Love,

Snappy Mouse*

 

Writing Prompts, Writings

Writing Prompt #1

Writing Prompt #1

“Jacob, Caroline and Lyle. I know what I did wasn’t something that I normally do. I just can’t sit by and watch her get abused. She needs someone to protect her.” I reason.

“I don’t care what you think she needed. If it she was meant to be protected she would be. You stepped in when you shouldn’t have.” Lyle snaps.

“Lyle, calm down. He did what he thought was right.” Caroline says putting her hand on her husband.

“Caroline, he is right, Xavier, shouldn’t have done it. It’s not in our nature to care about humans. We are supposed to make more demons, not save humans. Now we need to turn him in.”

“No. You can’t do that” Caroline says making the guys look at her. “I know what that girl is going throw. If she is like most of the girls in her situation she will become a demon to make the pain stop. So let’s see where this goes.” This can’t be good. Caroline is on my side? Lyle doesn’t seem to happy. As I was going to say something everything goes black. I’m being summoned. This can’t be good.

“How may I help you, Sarah?” I say as soon as appear.

“Can we talk?” She says softly. I smile.

“Sure. What do you want to talk about?” She looks at the window. “We can talk about anything.” I urge her on.

“I don’t want to be here anymore.” I must have looked confused when she finally looked at me. “I hate my life,” I sigh

“Look hold on till you are eighteen and you will be free of them. I promise.”

“Will you always be by my side?” Will I? Not if Lyle or Jacob turns me in. I have to gain her trust, so, I nod.

“I will always be by your side.”

I just wrote this one. I hope you guys like it. If you like it drop a like. If you want more Writing Prompts leave a comment. Have a goodnight everyone.

Midnight Thoughts

Fairies

Every since I was little, I have believed in fairies. It was the only girly thing that I had, since I grew up with all boys around me. So, the only girly thing that I had as a kid was fairies. My grandma would try to buy me normal Barbie dolls but I wouldn’t have it. The reason being was because the boys that were over all the time would cut their hair or draw on them so I had a few fairy dolls hidden. I loved them. There was no hiding that but at the same time I never really told anyone about them until now. I was very secretive as a child. That was the main problem when I was younger. That and I loved my revenge.

Sorry this is a short one tonight. Hope everyone enjoyed their day and hope you have a great day tomorrow. Goodnight everyone.

Story Time

Story Time

So, today I wanted to tell you guys a little story. I don’t plan on adding to it right now but that may change later. Like the post if you like the story. Keep in mind that it’s a rough draft. So, the grammar and spelling may not be at the best. I just wanted to share this with all of you guys.

Risking Rose

By: Jackie Willauer

“Please, Grand Master, I’ll try harder, I promise,” I say getting down on my knees. I am only saying this so I don’t end up on the street again. I’ve been living here for the last two year, and I know if he doesn’t like someone he will find anything to kick them out. I stare at him with pleading eyes.

“Here at Hanged Manner, you do something wrong two times you are thrown out.” He says looking up from his papers. “What, you’ve been here two or three years now?”

“Two, sir.” I say lowering my head.

“What makes you different from the rules?” he stands.

“I’m pregnant.” I say weakly

“You’re what?” he asks narrowing his eyes.

“I’m pregnant.” I say a little louder. This is the first time I seen the old man’s ice blue eyes soften.

“Who is the father?” he asks after a few minutes.

“Do I need to tell you sir?” I ask, He is going to kick me out. This isn’t something that he takes lightly.

“Yes. Now tell me.” He says sternly.

“You’re grandson.” I say looking at the ground. I hear him grab the phone on his desk. He dials a number.

“Justin,” he says making my head snap up in fear.

“I’ll just leave no need to get him.” I whimper.

“Get your ass down here. You, young lady sit, your butt on the couch.” I nod as he slams the phone down. Within four minutes Justin was in the office, breathing heavy like he had ran all the way down here. He looks over at me, his eyes widen and then narrow at me. I scoot over trying to get away from him. “Tell me when this happened.” The Grand Master snaps at Justin.

“When what happened?” Says Justin.

“When did you think having sex with someone staying here was a good idea?” he yells

“So, she told.” Is all Justin had to say.

“Well, she’s pregnant. So yeah, she told. It’s not like she had a choice in the matter.” I did have a choice, I didn’t have to tell him, I could have said nothing and packed my stuff and left. Not like Justin would have noticed.

“She’s what?” Justin says looking at me.

“I’m just going to pack my bag.” I get up and head towards the door. Justin grabs my arm.

“When were you going to tell me? Huh?” he slaps me.

“Justin let her go. Rose, sit your butt back down.” He says. I groan. “When were you going to tell him?”

“I was going to tell him when he started treating me with some respect. We have been having sex for six months now and all I am to him is a sex toy. So, telling him didn’t even cross my mind.” I say truthfully.

“So, what I didn’t need to know that I am going to be a father?” he asks with his eyes filled with hate.

“You do need to know but I wanted some respect from you first. You were drunk the first night we had sex and since then we have had sex every night. You had gotten drunk about six weeks ago and I did to. I guess we had sex more than once that night because that’s the only night I don’t remember” I say getting wet just thinking about the past six months. Justin looks at me,

“You remember every time but one?” he asks looking shocked. I nod.

“It felt so good to the point I never wanted it to end.” Justin walks over to me and kisses me hard. Making me become wetter.

“You two are getting married.” Grand Master says making us pull apart. I nod. Justin shakes his head.

“I’m not ready to be married yet.” He says backing away from me.

“I’m don’t care. You had sex and now she is pregnant. So, you need to step up.” He walks to the door. “Also, if you want your trust found then you are going to marry her.” Then he leaves,

“Rose?” he steps closer as I stand up.

“What? I need to get some-” he kiss me hard. I start kissing him back as he picks me up. Without breaking the kiss, he lays me down on the couch. I pull back. “I need some space. You need to think about what the hell you want,”

“I know what I want.” He says leaning in to kiss me again.

“No, you don’t. One minute you want me and the next you are treating me like shit. So, no you don’t.” I push him. He slowly gets up. I get off the couch. “Please come and find me when you know what you want.” I walk out the door.

“You’re not cutting me out of this. It’s My child too.”

“I’m the one carrying it. So, I can leave without you stopping me.” I say weakly. I need to do this I need to get a clear mind. I can’t keep doing this. I make it up to my room to find the grandmaster sitting on my bed. “I need to leave.” I say.

“Is it that bad between you two?” He asks not looking at me. He has a picture frame. He finally looks up, the tears falling from his face. “I took him in because his mother and father died on a boating trip. I knew he would bring trouble with him, but I didn’t know that he would do this. I’m sorry, for what he has done.” I sit next to him.

About Me., Midnight Thoughts

When I was little…

Okay so when I was little (about 6 or 7 years old) I knew that I wanted to do something with art. Not knowing what all art has under its wings. Before I get on a tangent about what all is considered art let me tell you about me. Art was my favorite thing along with telling stories. Yeah most parents tell their that they can be anything that they wanted. Well my dad wasnt in the picture until I was about 10 or 11. My mother was in and out of my life until I was about 9 or 9 1/2. When she showed up on my grandma’s door saying that she wanted me to move in with her. Of course my grandma being the sane person she is said no. That my mother would have to prove to her that she can take care of me. Well in the end she did show her that she could take care of me and make sure I went to school everyday. So, I moved in with her. She started dating a guy a few months after I moved in with her. He was an okay guy. I mainly liked his cooking but what do I know. Well they broke up but they stayed friends. He introduce my mother to my now step dad. They dated for about a six months before he moved in. About four months later she told me I was going to have a sibling. I always wanted someone to play with so I was happy. I was even more happier when I found out that it was a boy. I thought that i could teach him everything I knew. That he would come out ready to play. I didn’t understand that babies didn’t play like I did, I was still happy. When he started learning how to walk is when I started getting annoyed at him. He would always get into my stuff. I still loved him but I didn’t want him in my stuff. I would run down the hallway with him hot on my heels in his little bouncy walker. We started a room so, I would tell him stories that i made up when he couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t sleep because he would see me and think it was play time.

I miss those days when there were no boys that I wanted to date no sisters. Don’t get me wrong I love my sister but it was much more simpler without the three of them. I wouldn’t trade them for anything but I can’t help but think what would happen if they weren’t there. So back to little me. I would tell everyone stories some of them where based on true one but most of them weren’t true. But that’s a lot more than I thought I would put down in this post. But hey from what I’ve heard more is better. Well have a good day and a good week. Let me know if you want to know more about little me.